A lot has been on my mind and on my heart. I figured a blog post would be a great way to share with you some thoughts on how my journey in Catholicism is going so far.
Recently, I had spent some brief time away from social media just so I can refocus and pray. This time of being away from social media was a real blessing because it taught me a lot and it helped me understand some of what’s been going on in my own spiritual life.
First of all, I’d like to thank my dearly departed mother (+RIP), as well as my grandparents and other family members who helped me journey in Catholicism especially when I was young. You have taught me so much which I continue to carry with me to this very day the many lessons learned.
I have to be honest, my journey in Catholicism has not been easy. Twice in my life I had actually left the Church for brief periods of time to do some soul searching and to find God. I realized that I can’t find God in the distractions and temptations of the world. It was in these moments where Satan has tried to get my soul.
In my life, I have done many things for which I am not proud of but I have come to know God’s love and mercy through the Sacraments of the One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church. I admit that I am a sinner who has fallen many times and continues to fall but with God’s hand guiding me along the way, I can get back up and continue on the right path.
In my journey in Catholicism, I have been fortunate to attend retreats and go on pilgrimages. Retreats and Pilgrimages tend to create a high or mountaintop experience as some people like to refer to them as. However I have learned that the Catholic faith in my life and family doesn’t stop just because the retreat or pilgrimage is over. It is something that must be lived daily.
At different times in my life, I have had various people try to tell me how I should be living my life or my faith. How I choose to live out my life and faith is between myself and God.
People tend to have high expectations for their loved ones and friends. I believe that it is important to allow your family and friends to experience life and faith at their own pace in God’s time. Yes, we may not agree with how a person chooses to live their life or express their faith but it’s not our job to force others to align with our way of thinking. My advice if you are ever in this situation, pray for the person, gently encourage them, and offer to be there if they have questions or concerns.
When looking back on when I was young, I realized that my mom, grandparents, and other family members only wanted what is best for me. They did their best to make sure that I experienced life and faith at my own pace.
In my adult years, Catholicism still is a very important part of my life and it is something I will never turn my back on. I have attended various parishes throughout the years but the current parish I attend is a traditional Catholic parish. At my parish, the Traditional Latin Mass is celebrated daily. I have also attended the Latin Mass that is offered through the London Latin Mass Apostolate. I am very grateful for access to the Latin Mass because I get to experience the liturgy in a way that would have been celebrated when my grandparents were younger and those before them. The traditional liturgy has become an important part of my life as a Catholic. When attending a Traditional Latin Mass, there is reverence and beauty within the liturgy. You’d find women veiling, large families with their children praying and following in their missals. To me, this is what Catholicism is all about. Not the watered down faith you find in some parishes. Please know I am not judging those who choose to attend Novus Ordo parishes. Either way, when the liturgy is done right, it can be a beautiful experience for one and all.
I know that there have been people who have shared their concerns over my decision to attend a traditional Catholic parish. I am never going to turn my back on the Church. In my years of being a Catholic, I have come to learn that we each experience it differently whether it be liturgy or language. I just choose to experience Catholicism according to it’s traditions pre-Vatican II. Those of you who know me will know that I am not a supporter of modernism, liberalism, or heresy in the Church.
Some have accused me of being a sedevacantist just because I favor the way the Catholic Church was pre-Vatican II. I will be honest, I do not fully understand Sedevacantism. I continue to learn and grow in my Catholic faith while studying all aspects of the faith while listening to those in favor and those against life before and after Vatican II. Does this mean I am a sedevacantist? No. I believe it’s important to be educated. What I am though is……..
Where I choose to attend Mass or how I live out my Catholic faith is between me and God. I believe that one day I will be in front of God and I will have to account for my entire life. Please do not judge me for how I choose to live out my Catholic faith. God is the only judge. However, I do ask for continued prayer and support as I continue to search for truth.
What I will say is that I am very careful when it comes to my faith. The devil can attack at any time so I do my best to guard myself with the faith through liturgy, private prayer, discussions with clergy and fellow Catholics whether it be local or abroad, and being involved in the life of my parish.
I am very grateful for my Catholic friends and family who continue to journey alongside me as I continue to search for truth.
One thing I’ve learned is that I need to stop worrying about what other people think of me or my decisions. I am my own person and if I need help along the way, I will ask.
Our Lady of Fatima and St Pope Pius X, ora pro nobis.